I haven't been a very happy blogger lately. I don't exactly know what brought it on, but I think one day I was browsing through my blog and just felt dissatisfied with my work, like I wasn't good enough. Have any of you other bloggers ever felt this way before? I just all of a sudden lost motivation, stopped taking photos and planning what blog posts I wanted to get up for the week. I think my blogging mojo is slowly coming back, but sometimes it's hard to keep up momentum when it comes to talking about beauty products (there's only so much I can take of calling something "amazing!") and when you can't necessarily invest as much time into blogging as you'd like.
I see a lot of criticism and judgement being passed in the blogging community, which I suppose, fair enough, we all have our opinions and I'll even admit myself that I agree with some of them because everything can't be sunshine and rainbows all the time. However, it really angers me when I see people criticising other people over things they cannot control or for personal choices that really don't affect them whatsoever. Blogging as a full time job seems to be a pretty controversial topic these days and even though I can definitely see why it would be, at the same time, I also don't understand why people have such an issue with it. I mean, what makes blogging less of a job than any other job? Who's to say what defines a real job? If you're able to sustain yourself from the income you make from your blog, why the hell not?
Sometimes I think blogging full time would be the best job in the world. I love it as a hobby, but I can't put in the time like other bloggers can because I need to go to a job that I hate instead of putting effort into something I love. I do plan on leaving my job in retail this year to fulfil my dreams of moving to Melbourne and finally starting my career in social media, but for now, I need to make ends meet because all those goals and dreams of mine (does owning a Mulberry Alexa count as a dream?) require money. I've thought about what it'd be like to be a full time blogger, but at the end of the day, while it would be awesome, I don't think it's for me. There's nothing more I loathe than having to wake up early in the morning, but I also like that it gives me routine, which would be very hard to discipline myself with if I were working from home, and even though I would consider myself very much an introvert and a bit of a homebody, I think even I would get quite lonely. It's nice to get out of the house and I would miss the social interaction because while I do love talking to you all on Twitter, it just isn't the same. I think to make a decent income you can live off, you also need to advertise and do sponsored posts, which I'm just not into. I'd rather choose my minimalist layout over money and if I don't enjoy reading sponsored content on other blogs, then it certainly won't be something I'll ever choose to feature on my own. Blogging isn't something that's as widely recognised in Australia as the US or the UK either, and living on the other side of the world can make it difficult to be an Australian blogger too as while the Northern Hemisphere folk are promoting their blog through Twitter chats, us Australians are snoozing away in bed. Plus, we have opposite seasons, which means our content isn't as relevant to the majority of readers, but I guess that can also work to our advantage too as it's something different. I think unless you have a huge following as the likes of Tuula, Gary Pepper Girl and Oracle Fox, it would be extremely difficult to support yourself through blogging in Australia. Don't get me wrong, with hard work, I believe you can achieve anything, but I don't necessarily aspire to be at that level because as I mentioned, I'm more than happy with my blog being a hobby.
My days off work are less than glamorous as I rarely wear makeup on those days and instead of working on my blog, sometimes on my days off, I just want to do nothing or I want to better myself and have a more balanced life through other hobbies and interests such as reading, learning French and exercising. I don't always have pretty things to take photos of for Instagram and while I do eat good food, sometimes it isn't aesthetically pleasing enough (contrary to my last two Instagram photos). Other times, I just want to eat the damn thing without worrying about Instagram and enjoy social media for what it's worth. I don't think beauty PR is big in Australia either and I don't have enough money to constantly buy products all the time. Well, I could if I really wanted to, but then I'd have no savings and at the moment, I'm just enjoying what I have, trying to use up products and it feels really freeing not to get sucked into blogger hype for once. I've only ever received free items from one company before, but I thought it was enough to warrant a disclaimer. Plus, it stopped all those companies e-mailing me about sponsored content!
It's so easy to compare yourself to other bloggers and wish you could be as good as them. It's also the worst thing you can ever do no matter who or what you're comparing yourself to, but sometimes, you just can't help it. I think it's what momentarily took the joy out of blogging for me and I have to remind myself that I already am good enough. Maybe I don't have a crazy amount of followers, maybe my photography isn't as amazing as others, I'm not hugely knowledgeable in makeup and skincare and I certainly don't blog everyday, but none of those things define me as a blogger. A blog is a blog and it's yours to do whatever the hell you want with it. Blogging is very business orientated these days, but you should blog about what you want to and when you want to without obligations. As I gain more and more followers, sometimes I feel the pressure to put out more content, but as the online world becomes hugely saturated by beauty bloggers, I really struggle to come up with original content sometimes. I try my hardest to be somewhat different, but I guess you can only go so far until it all becomes a little same-sey. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try though (hint to the person who copied my 'Covering all bases' series). Sometimes I feel undeserving of all my amazing followers because I feel like I don't give back enough, but I think I lost sight of the real person I should be blogging for and that person is me. Yes, you lovely lot keep me motivated and driven, but it's only a small percentage of why I find it so much fun. I love taking photos, I love editing them in Photoshop, I love expressing myself through words (a lot of them) and incase it wasn't obvious, I really love beauty products.
While I don't think I could blog for a living (perhaps I'll change my mind in the future, who's to say?), it doesn't mean that we should put down those who do. If it means I get more content from those blogs I love, that's great. The same goes for YouTubers. Maybe those jobs won't last forever, but what does? Does anyone ever really do the same job forever these days? I mean, what kind of life would be living if we never lived in the moment and grabbed an opportunity while we could? If they aren't sustainable careers, that's not our problem to worry about. Sometimes I feel like judgement is passed on to me because I'm 25 and I haven't necessarily started my career yet nor have my driver's licence, but they're things I'm working on and just because I'm not there yet, it doesn't mean I won't ever will. We can't all have everything figured out at the "right age" and instead of looking down on people, we'd be better off trying to better ourselves and looking at the reason behind us being so judgemental. I've been asked to contribute to some amazing projects for some of the most incredible bloggers out there who I really look up to, and these are all things that are slowly building up my résumé. It's so overwhelming to have been given these opportunities and to have taken on such a workload while juggling them with my own blog, but you don't get anywhere without hard work and I am so ready for the challenge and I will give it my all.
I'm so sorry my blog posts are always ridiculously long, I guess I just have a lot of feels and if you do too, I'd love to hear them!